E*Trade anybody?
Our little guy is almost two, and growing fast. I can’t remember the last time I saw him walk. It’s always run, run, run. (He says “Go-go! Go-go!”) Every evening before bedtime we wrestle around on Mommy and Daddy’s big bed and I’m pretty sure that’s his favorite place in the whole house. Lately though, he’s been getting a little out-of-line and occasionally smacks one of us in the face. We usually just grab his hand and tell him that it’s not OK in a very stern manner but sometimes he persists and needs “enhanced” discipline techniques. (No water-boarding yet but I’m not ruling that out for the teenage years.)
Sometimes I can’t discipline him like I should because I’m laughing too hard and it’s not easy to do those two things at the same time. The problem is that when he smacks us it’s almost never because he’s upset about something, but rather we’re roughhousing and wrestling and he’s taking the game up a notch. I can usually tell when he’s about to do it because he leans back, locks eyes with his soon-to-be victim, get’s a little half-smile, twists away and then -POW!- snaps back with the open palm of destruction. It’s actually pretty impressive for a kid his age.
The best part is what happens next. He get’s this crazy look in his eyes that is, at the same time, a challenge and a plea for mercy. It’s like he’s saying, “Wha’cha gonna do now, big guy? (Remember I am your only heir.)” He’s smiling, eye’s locked on mine, and I can visibly see his fight-or-flight instinct kick in. He takes a big breath, smile gets a little bigger, his body language says he knows something big is about to happen.
So now what am I supposed to do? It’s a game to him. He want’s the Boss fight at the end of the level. Well we’re trying to discourage this type of behavior so I’ll grab his hand, give him the talk about how I’m sparing his insolent life, but just this once, and then I don’t let go of his hand. I keep it immobilized, kind of a misuse-it-and-lose-it penalty. He hates this. I’m pretty sure he’d rather I smacked his leg. He cannot stand to be pinned or confined in any way. Maybe this will make him good at wrestling in high school.